I almost didn’t go.  I have been feeling down with all the misery and devastation in Haiti front and center in my life.  This weekend, I didn’t want to go out of the house unless it was necessary.. like there was something bad with enjoying life.. like I couldn’t have two emotions going on in my soul at the same time. Well, it’s not true and it’s not right.   I kicked that thinking to the curb Saturday afternoon and made plans to drop by Rey’s Voodoo Lounge in Cary.

   My friend Bill Stonehouse sings there almost every Saturday night.  Like all of his fans, I adore him.  He’s exciting to watch because you can tell he’s having a really good time.

    A girlfirend I had not seen in months met me at the lounge.  Treggie’s on team Stonehouse, too!  We were there for hours before we knew it. We sang along with Bill, and later we danced along with Bill and his stunning wife Melissa. I am smiling as I type this, recalling the highlights of the night.  Most of them revolve arond the dancing part of the evening.  We really cut up!

   An unexpected highlight was my being invited to sing at the Voodoo. I had not rehearsed.  I didn’t bring along my backing tracks as I used to do with Bill.  I only wanted to enjoy the show. 

    Bill had me covered.  He had saved the tracks he’d downloaded when I sang with him on New Year’s Eve.  He said I should sing the 3 songs cued up and ready to go on his computer.

    I accepted Bill’s offer.  I am always happy happy happy to sing, so it was a big thrill for me.  I sang, Temptation, then Smooth Operator, and then The Wave.  No slip ups, no lyrics forgotten.   Again, I was asked to sing more, but I had given patrons all Bill and I had.

    What happened after that?  Just more good times with friends, and appreciation for talented artists passionate and fully dedicated to their careers.  Great artists like big, bad Bill.

"IF WE’RE GROWING, WE’RE ALWAYS GOING TO BE OUT OF OUR COMFORT ZONE."

–JOHN MAXWELL

I am in a good position to blog about experiencing fear, and going on with the show anyway. Read on friends, and you’ll understand why.

I was out of my comfort zone Thursday night at the Durham Performing Arts Center.  The Triangle Community Foundation was celebrating its 25th anniversary that night. I was invited to open the program…  singing GOTTA BE THIS OR THAT , and GET HAPPY .  The latter song was one that I had NEVER sang in public. The former, I’d done once in my life.

I know there has to be a first time for everything..  But this was not the group to be in front of– "trying out" a song.

This particular audience included some of the big movers and shakers in the community.  Everyone who contributed to the anniversary celebration needed to bring his or her "A" game.  Don’t get this twisted:  I got through my two songs, and though I may have looked happy and gay.. I was not in reality moving and grooving with the greatest of ease and comfort.

That is a feeling I hope not to feel again any time soon.

Just before I was scheduled to take the spotlight.. I revealed to my accompanist and voice coach that I had forgotten some of the words to GET HAPPY during the rehearsal.  I told her it was the reason I left her hanging during one verse of the song.  I tried to play it off… said I did not hear my cue during the practice run.  She closed the door on me saying, "Forget your troubles."

So there was that .  Here’s something else that didn’t help:

The group of wonderful people I was supposed to entertain, sat up perfectly straight and and just stared at me.  They never clapped a hand, tapped a foot, or popped a finger during my performance. Not that I could see anyway.

Boy, I could have used that kind of support from somebody, anybody– but it was not to be.

So I danced between the tables.. Touched a few shoulders and ended up on the stage for the big finish to GET HAPPY.

I am happy that I got a warm round of applause and then later some fine fine compliments about my performance.

Many said they were stunned to find out that I sang, and perhaps that helps to explain some of the blank stares.

I don’t mind being outside my comfort zone… I get that that’s growth.  I just want to feel 100 percent comfortable with my songs when I sing, that’s all. Always.